No respite ...

Man, life's a bitch or what...
2 months in New Zealand have taken their toll...

As a result, finally...
I'm still as confused as I was 2 months ago ...

How come it is that some people know exactly what they want from life, what they want to do...
Or atleast even if they dont, they dont bloody give a darn second thought about it...

Whereas I... why does it nag me so... I'm so unsure...
Every now and then, I come to a crossroads and wallow in doubt. Then i take one or the other road, and for a short while, i almost convince myself iv chosen the right path and I know where it leads. But then again as soon as it passed, I reach the crossroads yet again, and no...nothing is solved.

2 months in nz have helped. Im calmer now. I can think more clearly. Im not in the manic panic I was in 2 months ago. But it hasnt answered any of my questions. Im still just as confused, just not as afraid of being confused.

fuck...
why...

nite...